Yeah, I’m back in the Solana Galaxy – shoot me with your worst! (Ratchet and Clank)

I had thought I had gotten over the craziness of that Lombax and his little robot friend when I got bored of “Up Your Arsenal.” The third game wasn’t as exciting… until Volcano Style played through the old Ratchet and Clank and I decided to buy the series again. My first purchase was a PSP game called “Ratchet and Clank: Size Matters.”

Apart from the hilariously bad sexuality inneundo used in the title – for those of you who are curious as to what “size matters” means, go watch those stupid “male enhancement” commercials that pop up on TV – and several horrible glitches(one of them which made it impossible to advance to the next planet), the game was pretty good. I’ll probably be uploading videos of it to Youtube when I get the PS2 port of that game.

Anyways, I then repurchased the original games(including a bugged version of Going Commando which has sound problems on one cutscene and repeats another later on) and went through them all, including the dreaded Up Your Arsenal… which I found better than the last two games because there were no FREAKING RACES YOU HAD TO GO THROUGH! (Size Matters has another set of races which require a lot of practice to complete them all – jerkwads!) Oh, and the Plasma Whip is freaking awesome, but then, I did watch the latest Indiana Jones movie.

So, I plan on pre-ordering the newest PSP R&C game, Secret Agent Clank, which focuses on the robotic Clank as he plays out his super secret agent role to clear his Lombax buddy’s name and bail him from jail. I am going to preorder because I get a free Clank figurine to display on my computer. ^_^

“Punch, Kick, It’s All In The Mind…”

Well, my laptop recently died and I needed to replace the computer(which runs on Vista, which is stupid because now I can’t use my Dazzle Creator Studio or else it crashes and logs off my accounts), and I hadn’t been updating this blog lately, but now I have a sad confession to make.

 I went and purchased Parappa the Rapper for PSP.

I am a doomed man. Once Parappa the pup snatches you in his furry grip, you are damned.

All joking aside, the Parappa series is pretty good. I got interested after reading an UmJammer Lammy(which is the correctly spelling,  Ihad been using UnJammer, which is wrong) and I was hooked. The songs were really nifty, and the way Lammy rocks out like a rabid foaming-at-the-mouth Guitar Hero freak made me love it. Then I stumbled onto the Parappa videos on YouTube, and the rest is history.

The reason I had damned myself was because I didn’t buy the original PSX version of this game, and for good reason. The games are HARD. I played on the Easy mode, but you can’t get Cool on them and you are locked out after the third stage, so you have to bite the bullet and play on the regular mode, which is HARD AS NAILS.

I haven’t beaten the fifth stage yet, because I keep falling to Bad on the first line, which sucks.

Needless to say, the games are great. Masaya Matsuura is a god of rap, even more so than 50-cent(and I know I’m risking trouble by dissing 50-cent, but his attempt at being in a videogame sucked badly). Why Masaya hasn’t created his own rap band is beyond me, he would dominate the music industry with his awesome tunes. ^_^

 And if you think you can escape the ski-cap pooch by playing UmJammer Lammy, guess again: You unlock special variations of the second stage on where Parappa raps against the opponents! This is really awesome.

The fun part isn’t listening to the whole songs, but rapping “Cool” – when that happens, the opponent makes an excuse, withdraws, and lets you just go wild with rapping or jamming until your fingers fall off(but screw up and you get the opponent back and your timing is thrown off – I still have yet to rap Cool in the other stages of Parappa PSP).

Needless to say, Parappa and Lammy are probably an awesome duo and their games really make for the bizarre. I’m not a fan of animal-humanoids, but come on, an ant rapping in jive about being famous and loving his size, or a guy with an onion for a head rapping Japanese raps while breakdancing? You gotta love it. ^_^